


leave right through the window of my comfort

by sketchy_and_unformed



Category: Naruto
Genre: Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Hints of UST, I mean as much as a oneshot can be a slow burn, M/M, Slow Burn, pretty big hints tbf
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-02
Updated: 2020-12-02
Packaged: 2021-03-09 23:14:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,998
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27840565
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sketchy_and_unformed/pseuds/sketchy_and_unformed
Summary: FiveSix times Tenzo didn't see underneath Kakashi's mask and one time he did. A relationship overview.
Relationships: Hatake Kakashi/Yamato | Tenzou
Comments: 30
Kudos: 93





	leave right through the window of my comfort

**Author's Note:**

> I will never apologise for naming every single fic with a lyric by The Dangerous Summer. They are my KakaYama band and I love them.
> 
> Also: this is the fluffiest fluff I hope you like it :3

“You wear a mask all the time.”

Kakashi raised a languid eyebrow, observing the younger boy over the top of his book.

“Yes. And?”

“Why?”

“I wasn’t aware that I needed a reason,” Kakashi replied dryly.

“Hn.” Tenzō huffed, frowning. “I don’t understand it.”

“Ah,” Kakashi said. “This is part of your effort to learn social norms, is it?”

Tenzō reddened slightly. “Yes. I wondered if it was a convention I’m unaware of.”

“No convention,” Kakashi said, turning his attention back to his book. “Just your eccentric squad captain.”

“I thought perhaps it was usual for shinobi of your caliber.”

Kakashi smiled behind his mask. “Considering I’m the only one in ANBU who wears a mask outside of missions, that’s either very high praise or an appalling insult.”

Tenzō blushed harder. “I’m sorry. I spoke inappropriately.”

Kakashi softened a little. “No, Tenzō. You were curious and you asked. That’s a good thing. You’re still learning and I shouldn’t have teased.”

Tenzō smiled hesitantly. “I don’t mind when you tease. I’ve read that it’s something that close friends do with each other. It means that you like me.”

“Does it now?” Kakashi murmured, turning a page. “Well, isn’t that interesting?”

✽✦✽✦✽

“I have some more questions, senpai.”

“Call me Kakashi.”

Tenzō pulled a small notebook from his hip pocket and sat down at Kakashi’s feet. “Do you have a few minutes?”

“For you, Tenzō, I can spare a full fifteen,” Kakashi drawled. The sarcasm was lost on Tenzō who only frowned down at his notes.

“What does ‘smartass’ mean?”

Kakashi snorted. “Where did you hear that?”

“I told Matsumi his weapons pouch was incorrectly positioned and he called me that.”

“I see. Well, it means that your comment wasn’t appreciated.”

“I don’t understand.” Tenzō continued to frown. “I was merely reminding him of ANBU protocol.”

“Ah, well, I’m afraid that was a very smartass thing to do, Tenzō.”

“Following the rules is bad?”

“Following the rules isn’t bad. Correcting your superiors is.”

Tenzō’s face fell. “I didn’t want Matsumi-san to get into trouble with his captain, that’s all.”

“Maa, Tenzō,” Kakashi said, reaching down to ruffle the boy’s hair. “You always have the noblest intentions.”

“I do, honestly,” Tenzō said plaintively.

“I know, I know. I’ll teach you more about tact sometime soon, I promise.” He held up a preemptive hand. “Don’t ask me what tact means. Wait for the lesson.”

“Thank you, senpai.”

“What’s your next question?”

Tenzō consulted his notebook. 

“It’s about physical signs of affection. I understand what a bow means, and a handshake, and a hug or a kiss. But what does it mean to pinch somebody on the behind?”

Kakashi’s eyebrows shot upwards. “Somebody pinched you on the butt?”

“Yes. Many of the girls have, and some of the boys. Is it an insult?”

“Definitely not an insult,” Kakashi said, rubbing the back of his neck. “It’s a sign of, ah, admiration, I suppose.”

“I see,” Tenzō said solemnly. “Whom would it be appropriate for me to pinch on the, as you say it, butt?”

“You’re fifteen, Tenzō. Don’t pinch anybody on the butt. What else do the girls do?”

“They giggle a lot.” Tenzō puffed out his cheeks. “I don’t like it.”

“They’re just too shy to say that they like you,” Kakashi said gently.

“But the pinching hurts! Why do they hurt me if they like me?”

“Welcome to the world of love,” Kakashi answered airily and Tenzō’s eyes widened.

“Love?”

“Well, attraction at any rate.”

“I see,” Tenzō murmured, not looking as though he understood at all.

Kakashi smiled down at him. “Anything else?”

Tenzō looked away shyly. “I understand that it’s a personal matter, but I would still like to know why you wear that mask.”

Kakashi narrowed his eyes. “Lesson time is over now, Tenzō.”

✽✦✽✦✽

“It has to be on purpose, doesn’t it? He’s messing with all of us.”

“Either that or it’s a severe psychological disorder.”

Tenzō smiled as he took a seat beside Anko in the cafeteria. “Who are we talking about?”

“Your captain,” Anko said, pulling a face. “I don’t suppose you have any insight to offer us?”

“You’ll have to be more specific,” Tenzō said with a teasing smile. “Almost everything he does could be considered a disorder.”

Iroha snorted. “Very true, but this time we meant the mask.”

Tenzō shook his head. “I don’t know why he wears it. I have asked.”

“Well, there you go,” Anko said, slumping forward onto the table. “If even little Tenzō doesn’t know the answer, there’s no hope for any of us.”

“Have any of you ever seen his face?” Tenzō asked.

Ryuki shot him a look. “Are you joking? We were going to ask _you_.”

“I wonder what he’s hiding under there,” Anko said dreamily. “I can’t imagine he’s anything other than gorgeous. He has such beautiful eyes.”

“Beautiful _eye_ ,” Iroha corrected.

“Maybe it’s scars,” Ryuki said. “Or a really hideous deformity.”

“I don’t think he’s hiding anything,” Tenzō said. “I think it’s to do with his sense of smell. He’s almost as good at tracking as his ninken.”

“If that’s true then how does he put up with the smell of his own breath? It must be horrible behind that mask!”

“Who has bad breath now?” They all whipped around to see Kakashi standing at the other end of the table, looking between them suspiciously.

“Nobody,” they chorused.

✽✦✽✦✽

“Let’s stop for lunch in the next town.”

Yugao almost tripped over her feet. “Really?”

“This was a five-day mission and we finished it in three,” Kakashi said, smiling with his eyes. “You all did well. You deserve a treat.”

“You’re paying, captain?” Iroha asked hesitantly.

“I would,” Kakashi said, scratching the back of his neck, “only, I forgot my wallet.”

A collective groan rose from the other three shinobi and Kakashi held up his hands defensively. “I’ll cover it when we get back to Konoha, I promise.”

“We know what your promises are worth,” Iroha muttered darkly.

“I can cover you, Yugao,” Tenzō said and the kunoichi smiled gratefully.

“Maa, Iroha,” Kakashi said, slinging an arm around his shoulders, “you wouldn’t let your captain starve, would you?”

“Just watch me.”

“There’s a two-man tracking mission in Kirigakure that starts on Monday. I was going to send Ryuki and Tenzō, but…”

“Oh, fine,” Iroha snapped, “but we’d better stop somewhere cheap. This is my beer money.”

They found a ramen kiosk in the town centre and, recognising their ANBU uniforms, the shop owner gave them a 20% discount.

Iroha nudged Tenzō as they waited at the counter for their food. “Hey. He’ll have to take his mask down to eat, right?”

Tenzō glanced at him. “If it were that simple, we all would have seen his face by now.”

“Not true. He never eats real food in front of us, only soldier pills. I’d like to see him try to eat ramen without taking it down.”

“I’m telling you, he won’t.”

“Want to make a wager?”

Tenzō shook his head sanctimoniously. “If Kakashi-senpai doesn’t want to reveal his face, it’s not right of us to try and see it.”

Iroha bumped against him, grinning. “Matsumi was right, you are a goody two shoes.”

“Tell Matsumi where he can stick his kunai,” Tenzō said, blushing.

“What was that, Tenzō?” Kakashi called from behind them. “Please elaborate.”

Iroha sniggered and Tenzō blushed harder.

✽✦✽✦✽

Tenzō didn’t let himself stop to catch his breath until they’d found shelter, a cave that was barely more than a dent in the undergrowth, shallow but wide. He and Kakashi dove inside and Tenzō used mokuton to cover the opening with natural looking branches.

They both sat panting, watching the storm outside, waiting to find out if they had been followed. Kakashi was confident they’d shaken the enemy two miles back in the forest but the rain made it harder for him to catch their scent. It was possible that he was wrong.

The hollow was too low to stand up in comfortably but at least it offered protection from three sides and they could sleep there if they had to. For now, there was nothing to do but watch, wait and hope.

Kakashi had come off the worst from the ambush, sporting an impressive purple bruise over his right eye and a series of slashes to his jaw and neck that had sliced clean through his ANBU mask. The flow of blood had slowed to an ooze but the cuts looked angry and deep where they showed through the dirt and torn fabric, at risk of infection if not patched up quickly.

“Senpai–”

“You should conserve your chakra,” Kakashi said. “I’ll be fine.”

Tenzō had only superficial defensive wounds to the arms but he’d been forced to use a lot of mokuton to cover their retreat. As much as he wanted to protest and heal Kakashi quickly he could feel the tug of exhaustion on his reserves. If they hadn’t been followed, they could be back in Konoha in under twelve hours. Using his chakra to heal was a risk likely not worth taking.

“The first aid kit, then,” he conceded. “You need stitches.”

“You’re probably right,” Kakashi said, eyes still fixed on the world outside of their shelter and making no move to assist. Tenzō sighed and knelt beside him, fishing the slim leather roll from one of his pouches.

Kakashi’s mask was cut to ribbons, barely clinging to his face. Dried blood obscured most of the skin beneath but Tenzō caught a flash of pale close to his nose. He turned quickly away.

“Your mask.”

Kakashi seemed to snap back into focus and brought his hands to his face. The ruined fabric stuck to the wounds and he hissed as he peeled it carefully away. Tenzō looked down at the first aid kit intently.

“Do you have enough chakra?”

“For what?”

Tenzō shifted uncomfortably. “For a henge. Your face, I mean. I–”

“You can look, Tenzō.”

Kakashi’s tone was almost amused, yet soft as well in a way that Tenzō had rarely heard it. Kakashi was often nonchalant, rarely raising his voice outside of missions, but now he sounded closer to affectionate.

“No,” Tenzō returned. “I can either hold up a mirror for you to stitch yourself up, or you should cover as much of your face as you can.”

“It’s an emergency situation. I don’t mind–”

“I said no, senpai,” Tenzō said firmly. “I...I respect your boundaries. I don’t want to look if I don’t have to.”

“I see,” Kakashi said.

The rain hitting the ground’s litter of dead leaves covered up their silence, which was then broken by the telltale sound of Kakashi moulding his chakra. When Tenzō hesitantly raised his eyes, a mirror image of himself looked back at him. He huffed out a laugh.

“An interesting choice.”

“Closest reference I had to hand,” Kakashi replied impassively.

It was strange for Tenzō to see himself with Kakashi’s mannerisms. He tried to ignore it as he doused a cotton pad with rubbing alcohol. “This will sting, I’m sorry.”

“Only you would apologise for that,” Kakashi said. The note of fondness lingered in his voice.

Even though Kakashi had made himself look like Tenzō, Tenzō was very aware that he was working on Kakashi’s bare face, on skin that was normally hidden by cloth. As he cleaned the wounds that Kakashi had left visible his fingertips caught on stubble and he sucked in a quick, quiet breath.

“Okay?” Kakashi asked.

“I should be asking you that,” Tenzō replied, colour rising high on his cheeks.

He worked quickly and efficiently until Kakashi was all stitched up. As he broke off the last thread, Kakashi touched the back of his hand.

“Thank you.”

“Do you have a spare undershirt in your pack?” Tenzō asked, quickly retreating.

Kakashi stripped off his ruined undershirt quickly. He hadn’t bothered to disguise his body and it was very disconcerting for Tenzō to see his own face pasted onto Kakashi’s physique, leaner and paler than his own. Kakashi saw his discomfort and grinned wickedly.

“Perhaps I should keep this face for a while. Does it suit me?”

He flexed his arms and the brown of his hair suddenly turned to silver, falling in Kakashi’s usual spikes over Tenzō’s round, dark eyes. Tenzō spluttered out a laugh.

“It’s not a good look, senpai.”

“Hmm, you’ve always worn it well.” Kakashi tugged on the clean undershirt, adjusting the mask carefully over the stitched wounds. He released the rest of the henge and his grey eye twinkled. “I might try wearing you around Konoha sometime.”

Tenzō blushed harder at the deliberate innuendo, busying himself packing away the first aid kit. “Just don’t do anything I wouldn’t do,” he mumbled to fill the silence.

“What wouldn’t you do, Tenzō?”

The question caught him deeply off guard and he looked up to find Kakashi’s gaze fixed on him. The air was suddenly, inexplicably thick with tension, the moment more charged than it had any right to be. 

Tenzō swallowed, trying to calculate an appropriate response. Kakashi cut him off before he could.

“Don’t answer that,” he said, turning away to spread his soaked vest out on the cave floor. “Some things are better left unspoken, don’t you think?”

Tenzō let out a breath he hadn’t realised he was holding. “I think it’s best that they are, yes.”

“It seems like we’re safe,” Kakashi said, suddenly jovial, shattering the atmosphere like a thrown glass. “Shall we wait for the rain to let up before we make a move?”

“Why not?” Tenzō said, allowing himself to smile.

✽✦✽✦✽

Tenzō was returning from the market when he rounded a corner and bumped smack into a racing Kakashi. He dropped his bags and apples rolled across the cobblestones.

“What on Earth–”

“Tenzō!” Kakashi exclaimed, ducking behind him and peering around his arm. “You have to hide me!”

“An enemy?” Tenzō asked, reaching for a weapon.

“Worse,” Kakashi hissed. “Curious genin.”

“What–”

“Where did he go?” a voice hollered, its source drawing steadily closer.

Kakashi tugged Tenzō around and gave him a fierce glare. “You haven’t seen me, okay?”

“Okay,” Tenzō replied and Kakashi vanished in a swirl of leaves.

Tenzō crouched to retrieve his dropped groceries as Kakashi’s genin team barrelled around the corner.

“Oh!” the pink-haired girl said, pulling up just before she trod on a package of mochi. “Excuse me, jonin-sama, but have you seen Kakashi pass by here?”

“Kakashi?” Tenzō said thoughtfully, rubbing his chin. “No, I can’t say that I have.”

The dark-haired boy’s eyes narrowed. “How did you drop those groceries?”

“I was startled by a stray dog,” Tenzō said smoothly.

“Where’s the dog now?”

“How in the world should I know? Say, could you three help me pick up these things?”

“No time!” the blonde boy shouted. “Come on, guys, he can’t have gone far.”

“I swear, we’ll see his face today if it kills me!” the girl exclaimed, taking off after him. The other boy frowned at Tenzō one last time before following much more sedately after his teammates.

Once their voices had faded, Kakashi landed lightly beside Tenzō.

“Sorry about the groceries.”

“Never mind,” Tenzō said. “What was that about?”

“It seems they’ve made a bet about what I’m hiding under this mask. I’ve been avoiding them for two hours now. Frankly, it’s getting exhausting.”

“Well, if you ever need a bolthole, you know where I live,” Tenzō said companionably. “They’d never look that far away from the village centre.”

“Thank you,” Kakashi said with a smile. “I’ll remember this kindness, Tenzō.”

“So long,” Tenzō said to a swirl of empty air.

✽✦✽✦✽

Tenzō woke up unwillingly, face scrunched in a frown. Something had woken him and as he lay in his tangle of blankets he heard it again, a light tapping sound on the other side of the house. 

He stumbled out of bed and slipped on the short satin robe he normally wore to and from the shower, tying it loosely at the waist. He hoped he was mistaken about the sound or that it was only some lost traveller in search of direction. It was a cold night and he already missed the warmth of his bed as he lit a candle to carry through the living room. 

He didn't know exactly what time it was but he'd been deeply asleep so he had to guess after 2am. Very late for a visitor to call. 

He cracked the front door open and peered outside. 

Kakashi stood on the porch, his hands in his pockets. 

"I woke you. I'm sorry."

"Senpai?" Tenzō blinked owlishly at him. "Is something the matter?" 

"Ah, no. But I was hoping that I could impose on your hospitality. You see, the water is out in my apartment." 

"You want to stay here?" The clinging threads of sleep were making Tenzō's thoughts sluggish. "Of course. Come in." 

Kakashi let out a breath. "Thank you, Tenzō. I'll take the couch, of course." 

Tenzō stepped back to let Kakashi inside and a rush of chill air followed him. Tenzō shivered and realised, with a jolt of horror, exactly how little he was wearing. He’d bought the robe on a whim, liking the yellow colour and apple tree motif and fully intending for it to be seen by no one. But now his former captain’s eyes were resting on the exposed V of his chest and he flushed and crossed his arms.

Kakashi cleared his throat. "That's…a very nice robe." 

“It was a gift,” Tenzō lied. "Ah, you said your water was out." 

"Yes." 

Something occurred to Tenzō and he narrowed his eyes suspiciously. "You could have stayed until the morning, couldn’t you?" 

"The power is out, too," Kakashi said quickly. "And the gas. The apartment is like an ice box." 

"And this all happened at–" Tenzō consulted the table clock, "two forty five in the morning?" 

Kakashi rubbed the back of his neck. "Something like that." 

Tenzō sighed and set his candle down on the mantelpiece. Kakashi had always been reticent with his emotions, almost as though he and not Tenzō had been the one trained to suppress them. Normally Tenzō was content to believe Kakashi’s tales, or at least pretend to for the sake of allowing him to save face, but the lateness of the hour made him bold. He sensed that what Kakashi really needed–why he had come to Tenzō–was for somebody to see through his bullshit and force him to confront his feelings. He had always been too stubborn, perhaps too prideful, to do so without a push.

Tenzō hadn't seen much of Kakashi since the other man had left ANBU but he knew that his genin team, the first he had captained, had fallen apart with all three leaving to train with the legendary Sannin. He could imagine how, to somebody with Kakashi’s life experience, that could feel dangerously close to abandonment.

"If you don’t want to be alone tonight,” Tenzō said, “then just say it." 

For a moment Kakashi looked caught, then his shoulders dropped. "You know me too well after all, Tenzō," he said.

"That's why you came here, isn't it? Because I know you."

"I came here because I trusted you not to leave me to freeze on your doorstep," Kakashi cracked. The attempt at humour fell flat.

"If you do trust me," Tenzō said gently, "then trust me enough to tell me the truth. You don't need to act tough with me, Kakashi. I know exactly how strong you are and everything that you're capable of. Right now you can just be human." 

Kakashi looked away, seeming to struggle with something. Whether he was searching for the right words or processing some overwhelming emotion, Tenzō couldn't tell. Finally he responded in a voice uncharacteristically strained. 

"Thank you. Truly."

Tenzō's fingers twitched. If it were anyone else in front of him, so clearly lost and hurting as Kakashi was, he would hug them. But Kakashi had always maintained a careful distance, not only from Tenzō but from everybody. 

Physical contact that extreme was a boundary that Tenzō had never felt he had permission to cross.

Instead, he picked up the candle and turned away. "I have spare blankets in the closet. Do you need something to sleep in?" 

"Only if you find the sight of me in my underwear terribly offensive," Kakashi said, sounding perfectly like his usual irreverent self. 

Tenzō fussed finding the blankets and cushions. When he reentered the living room with them in his arms Kakashi had already taken off his trousers and sweater, leaving him in briefs and an undershirt, mask attached.

Tenzō swallowed. "Ah, it's a rather old futon, I'm afraid. Not very comfortable. I don't often have guests." 

"That's alright," Kakashi said, taking the bundle from him. His bare arms brushed against Tenzō's hands. "I appreciate it all the same."

"The bed," Tenzō blurted and Kakashi caught his eye questioningly. "It's more than big enough for two, if you'd rather…share." 

"Share your bed?" Kakashi asked curiously and Tenzō blushed. 

"I'm sorry, that was a stupid thing to–" 

"Alright." 

Tenzō's breath caught. "Yes?" 

"It would be nice not to be alone," Kakashi said. "If you really don't mind." 

He’d never heard Kakashi admit to anything so honestly. There was always an excuse, a justification or a joke attached. It hit him right between his throat and his heart and the urge to hug the other man came back stronger.

"Of course,” he said, trying not to betray in voice or expression how much he was affected by Kakashi asking for his company. "Right. I'll, ah. Sleep clothes. I should–" 

"It's your house," Kakashi said, walking through to the bedroom. "You should be comfortable to wear whatever you normally would.”

“That would definitely be an offensive sight,” Tenzō cracked.

“I mean it,” Kakashi said. “You’re doing me a favour, Tenzō. I don’t want to put you out.”

“It’s nothing,” Tenzō said. “Honestly. I’ve always sort of hoped you’d visit, eventually.”

Kakashi dropped his armful of linens onto the bed, leaving his bare legs visible. Tenzō fought the urge to cover himself again. His robe was almost scandalously short but, he knew, Kakashi had seen him in less. On ANBU missions they had showered side by side plenty of times, but that had been practical. Inviting Kakashi into his bed now, even just to sleep, felt...intimate.

As Tenzō was in turmoil, Kakashi seemed unfazed. “I'll use these blankets if you like,” he said casually. “That way we won’t have to share." 

Tenzō shook his head without thinking. “No, that’s okay. I don’t mind.”

Separate blankets or not, Tenzō couldn't see how he'd ever be able to get back to sleep with Kakashi in his house, in his _bed_. Kakashi regarded him carefully and then nodded.

“Alright.”

A few minutes later Tenzō lay stiffly on his back in the dark bedroom, bare chested beneath the blankets. He was, as he had suspected, painfully aware of Kakashi's presence in the bed beside him, although it was mostly because the other man couldn't seem to stay still for longer than a minute at a time. After one particularly violent movement Tenzō finally spoke up.

“What’s wrong?”

“It’s nothing," Kakashi said. "I just don’t normally...sleep in the mask.”

Tenzō rolled onto his side, away from him. “You don't have to now. I won’t look, I promise.”

“I know you wouldn't,” Kakashi said with a surprising amount of affection.

Tenzō started when a strong arm slid around his waist but quickly settled when Kakashi pressed warm against his back.

“Okay?” he murmured, his voice a low rumble. Tenzō found his hand on his stomach and covered it with his own.

“Yeah.”

They’d slept in close quarters before in their ANBU days, huddled together for warmth in drafty shelters, but that had been years ago and they’d been better friends then. It felt comfortably familiar to have Kakashi so close, as though his muscle memory had held on to those days, but his mind couldn’t relax even if his body could.

He had known Kakashi very well at one time, had even fancied himself closer to his captain than anyone else in Konoha was. Now, although barely three years had passed, it felt like Kakashi had lived a whole other life away from him. He could no longer presume to understand what lay in Kakashi’s heart, if in fact he had ever known that much.

This man who had shown up in the middle of the night because he couldn’t face sleeping alone again, who was so grateful for such simple gestures from Tenzō and who had draped himself across Tenzō’s back in the darkness, this wasn’t the Kakashi that he knew. His mind warred between joy that Kakashi had come to him for support that he was able to provide, in however small a way, and fear of this previously unseen side of him. His instincts revolted against the unknown, protesting the role reversal that forced him to be the rock that Kakashi could cling to, and yet he thrilled in it, too. It was a real, human connection between them, something that he’d always selfishly wished that they could have. He wasn’t happy that Kakashi was hurting but Kakashi had come to _him_ and he couldn’t help but be warmed by that fact.

After long minutes in silence, Kakashi spoke again.

“I thought it was different this time. We were a team, the four of us together. I thought I could make up for before. I thought I could take it all back.”

“It’s not your fault that they left,” Tenzō said. “You did everything you could.”

“It’s never enough,” Kakashi said. “They all go away in the end.”

“I haven’t,” Tenzō said.

“No,” Kakashi agreed. He slid his hand up to Tenzō’s chest and pulled him closer. His chin caught on Tenzō’s shoulder and Tenzō realised with a flare of heat low in his stomach that his mask was down. His breath was a hot flutter over Tenzō’s skin that hitched as Kakashi nuzzled into his hair. His nose bumped Tenzō’s ear, his lips following behind

It was as though he’d been drugged, Tenzō thought. He’d never known Kakashi to be so...so _needy_. It was both thrilling and awful. That the man wasn’t in his right mind was very clear.

“I’m sorry I’m not here more often,” Kakashi murmured against the nape of his neck. “I didn’t mean to neglect you. It’s just that...my world changed, I suppose. But I should have kept a place for you in it.”

“It’s alright,” Tenzō said, heart beating too fast in his chest.

“It isn’t,” Kakashi said, “but I do appreciate you, Tenzō. A lot more than I show it. You’ve been the most stable, reliable person in my life, and I–”

“Kakashi, stop,” Tenzō interrupted. “You don’t have to say these things.”

“You asked me to trust you,” Kakashi said and the hand on his chest moved to curl around his shoulder. “I’m trying to tell you that I–”

“You’re hurt right now,” Tenzō said, not daring to move. “You’re vulnerable. Don’t say something you’ll regret in the morning.”

He felt Kakashi press his forehead between his shoulders and let out a sigh that drifted over the bare skin of his back, raising goosebumps in its wake.

“Even now, you know what’s best for me better than I do myself,” Kakashi said. “You’ve always looked out for me, Tenzō. I owe you so much.”

Tenzō’s throat felt tight and he swallowed thickly against it. “The only thing you owe me is to take care of yourself. You mean a lot to me as well. I hope you know that.”

“I do,” Kakashi breathed, then pressed a startling, open-mouthed kiss to Tenzō’s spine. 

Tenzō shivered and held his resolve only by an immense effort of willpower. He couldn’t resist, though, catching Kakashi’s hand and bringing it to his lips.

“We can talk in the morning, if you still want to,” he said against Kakashi’s knuckles. “You should sleep now.”

“Thank you,” Kakashi whispered and then retreated to the other side of the bed.

Tenzō grabbed handfuls of the blankets and tucked himself in tightly, as far away from Kakashi as he could get.

“Sleep well, senpai,” he said into the darkness.

✽✦✽✦✽

Tenzō stepped out of his cabin one morning to find Kakashi lounging on the porch, book in hand.

“Good morning, Tenzō.”

“Yamato,” he patiently corrected. “Can I help you with something, senpai?”

“I’d like to treat you to lunch,” Kakashi said. Tenzō’s mouth dropped open and Kakashi’s eyes narrowed. “No need to look so surprised. I do owe you, after all.”

“Yes, but you owe me at least fifty lunches and you’ve never repaid one yet!”

“There’s a first time for everything,” Kakashi said. “Are you coming or not?”

They went to Ichiraku but, to Tenzō’s surprise, Kakashi ordered their food to go and led him through the village to the furthest training ground. It was empty but the sounds of shinobi sparring in the neighbouring fields drifted through the air. Kakashi gestured lazily at the treeline where the grass was shaded from the noon sun.

“Perhaps a bench, if you’d be so kind?”

Tenzō smiled and used his mokuton to craft a simple seat for them. He sat down and started to unpack their food.

“Yours is the eggplant miso, isn’t it? And then we have–”

He glanced up at Kakashi and almost spilled a full container of scalding hot soup into his lap because Kakashi–

Kakashi wasn’t wearing his mask.

Tenzō stared. And stared.

Kakashi narrowed his eyes.

“Have you seen a ghost?”

“Your mask,” Tenzō squeaked and Kakashi shrugged nonchalantly.

“It’s about time you saw me without it, isn’t it?”

Tenzō was at a loss for words. Kakashi smiled–his lips! He could see his lips!–and apparently took pity on him, filling in the gaps.

“How long have we known each other now, Tenzō? Is it ten, eleven years? And you’ve never once tried to see me without the mask. You’ve even turned down the opportunity before. So I thought that if anybody deserved to see my face, it’s you.”

A soft, slow blush started at Tenzō’s neck and crept up to his face. “Senpai,” he breathed, awestruck.

“Now, now,” Kakashi scolded good-naturedly, “eat up before it goes cold.”

There was a shake in Tenzō’s fingers as he opened the food containers. As he ate, he snuck glance after glance at Kakashi’s face. Gods, but he was very handsome; he had always suspected as much but had given up on the idea of ever knowing for sure. Kakashi’s nose and mouth were slight, almost delicate, suiting his narrow face perfectly. A small mole below his lower lip added a perfect imperfection and Tenzō wondered if such an insignificant blemish could possibly be the real reason for the mask. He wondered, giddily, if he now had permission to ask. He didn’t think he could handle so much all in one day.

“Thank you for your help training Naruto,” Kakashi said around a mouthful of eggplant. “He couldn’t have finished that jutsu without you.”

“It was my pleasure,” Tenzō murmured, fixated by a droplet of soup that had splashed onto Kakashi’s chin.

“I was very glad to learn that it was you who would be taking charge of the team while I was indisposed,” Kakashi continued. “There’s no one in Konoha I would have trusted more, you know.”

Tenzō was beginning to suspect that he had stumbled into an alternate universe. As an ANBU captain Kakashi had always thanked his teammates for their support, Tenzō included, but he had never praised him so openly before. It made his insides feel warm from more than just the ramen.

“You’re an outstanding shinobi and a true friend,” Kakashi said and Tenzō finally spoke up.

“Am I missing something? Are you dying, Kakashi? You have to tell me if you’re dying.”

Kakashi looked at him and the corners of his mouth lifted the barest amount. Tenzō realised he had seen him wear this expression before, but when he’d only been able to see his eye it had barely been distinguishable from his usual cool indifference.

Now, though, with that soft, almost smile playing at his lips, it was clearly something else entirely. And it was only for him.

“Did you think that I didn’t appreciate everything that you are, Tenzō?” Kakashi said warmly.

“N-no, I mean...I just didn’t expect...any of this,” Tenzō said falteringly.

Kakashi plucked the ramen container from his hands and placed it on the ground at their feet then caught Tenzō’s hands in his own.

“Well, now that the mask thing is out of the way, I suppose I can finally take you out to dinner.”

Tenzō’s expression was blank. “But we’re eating together now, senpai.”

Kakashi tilted his head. “I was thinking of something a little less casual.”

“Is there a formal event that I’m unaware of?” Tenzō asked.

Kakashi sighed and looked away. “I was wrong, this isn’t any easier.”

“What isn’t any–”

He was cut off abruptly by Kakashi’s lips pressing against his own. Tenzō squeaked again and Kakashi pulled away and grinned at him.

“I’m trying to ask you out on a date, you idiot.”

It felt like all the breath had been punched out of him. “You’re _what_?”

“Don’t get shy on me now,” Kakashi said lightly, but the pink tint over the bridge of his nose told that this didn’t mean so very little to him as he would have liked to make out. “We’ve waited for long enough, haven’t we?”

Tenzō looked down at his hands clasped in Kakashi’s, then back to his eyes. “You really mean it.”

Kakashi nodded and stroked his fingers. “I’m sorry it took me all this time. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to before. You were just...too easy to forget about.”

Tenzō blinked slowly. “Thank you, senpai,” he deadpanned and Kakashi pulled a face.

“That came out wrong. What I mean is, you always keep yourself in the background. You bury all of your talents underneath your drive to serve Konoha and its people. And your service to me.”

“Ah,” Tenzō said awkwardly. Tentatively he squeezed Kakashi’s fingers and thrilled when the other man squeezed back.

“I took you for granted,” Kakashi said quietly. “I assumed you’d always be there because I needed you to be. Do you remember that night last year when I showed up on your doorstep in the middle of the night?”

“Of course,” Tenzō said.

“You stopped me from saying something that night,” Kakashi said, “But I never forgot it. The feeling never went away. You were right to stop me, though. I didn’t have the capacity then. I hope that I do now.”

“Capacity for what?” Tenzō breathed, hardly daring to speak for fear of breaking the spell.

Kakashi let go of his hands to stroke his face, the backs of his fingers brushing over the edge of his happuri, catching on the corner of his mouth.

“The capacity to treat you as well as you deserve to be treated.”

Tenzō’s words stuck in his throat. He closed his eyes to force them out.

“And what...feeling?”

He heard Kakashi shift and then the other man’s mouth was pressing lightly but insistently against his own. Tenzō parted his lips with a sigh and softly met Kakashi’s tongue. The kiss was slow and gentle but fierce heat licked down his spine all the same.

He had been waiting for so very long, after all.

When Kakashi broke away he could still feel the smile on his lips and he kissed him again clumsily with both hands in his hair. Kakashi nipped on his lower lip and took advantage of his gasp to pull away far enough to speak.

“I love you, Tenzō.”


End file.
